Caution: contains some hot hatred towards Mr. Pointy Hat. So if you like Elminster, please look the other way.

Okay... this journal entry is somewhat different from others. Just like I ranted about Skyrim (Vampires and Werewolves), now I'm gonna do the same with... Baldur's Gate. To be more precise, about one special character from that game. A character you all know. But do not worry, I have nothing against BG and won't have in a long time. Maybe FOREVER! I must admit that recent news about BGEE and ME3 (Or rather ME3 ending with all those plot holes and BS) made me think about original BG. So. I'm gonna analyze just... one... epilogue and share my thoughts about the subject. I spent the whole afternoon trying to organize my arguments.

So.

Like I said before, I'm gonna rant about something that happened 11-12 years ago! Yes, I'm slow! Dx But it wasn't my fault. Wah!

You all know that love Baldur's Gate to bits: (it was my first 'real' RPG) it has great story, smooth gameplay and, most important, memorable characters. Yes, to me, characters make the backbone of RPGs. I liked/loved pretty much everyone, and I've played with different parties all that time and truly enjoyed the experience. They had great, in-depth dialog, interesting history and vivid personalities (at least in BG2 ) I mean where can you meet a drow, who had fled to the surface after her powers had been stripped away? Or a ranger, who never uses the word 'I' and has a hamster animal companion (in short MGSH)? Or a druid, who's parents were killed in a civil war? Who possibly can top THAT? NOTHING, I say! *llama face*

If you've browsed my gallery even a little, you might have noticed how much time I've spent doing BG fanarts. Character fanarts. (yes, I'm trying to shamelessly promote my art, don't hate me) Also you might have found out that my favorite character is, of course, that egoistic and sarcastic wizard Edwin. More to the point, yes, I'm gonna talk about Edwin's cannon epilogue, and how IT MADE NO FREAKING SENSE. It is kinda sad, that the majority of people, who'd traveled with you, went up dead/gone. It is clear, that the designers wanted to make mostly sad endings (for example Viconia dies of poisoning if you romance her, Keldorn and Korgan die (*heroically*) and where the hell is Minsc and his Justice Fist? Dx) And I'm supposed to feel thankful, since Edwin didn't die or anything like the others, though he's stuck as a female permanently now and works in a Waterdeep tavern. WUT? Yeah, thank you very much! I'M SO RELIEVED! (AND you might have noticed in the ending Throne of Bhaal cinematic Edwin is (suspiciously) absent. The cinematic show Imoen, Jaheira, Minsc and Viconia -- all returning characters from BG1, excluding Edwin-- Gorion, Melissan, Yoshimo, Sarevok, a suspicious woman in a hood, which, presumably, is Alianna, CHARNAME's mother)  

Okay, more to the point: PLOT HOLES in Edwin epilogue (I need some raging out) Just because I feel like it, I'm quoting his ending so you can see, what I'm talking about.

Edwin gained great renown in his travels with , and in the years following their association he would exploit that infamy. In time he achieved enough influence to subjugate even the Red Wizards themselves, becoming the greatest leader they had known in recent memory. Very recent memory, it turns out, as he was deposed scant days later. Such is the brief nature of
conquerors in Thay, practically lining up for their turn in power. His only notable appearance following this embarrassment was in battle with Elminster of Shadowdale himself, a short affair that saw the end of Edwin's existence in the Realms. Edwina, however, tends bar in a Waterdeep tavern. She is a bitter, bitter woman.

Plot hole #1: Conquering of Thay

*puts her critique glasses* The epilogue states, that Edwin had managed to subjugate the Red Wizards and became the greatest leader in recent history. Ahem. (No offense, Edwin, oh god) According to cannon Thay history, the lich called Szass Tam unofficially rules Thay. So what? He just disappeared or something? He was in decree leave in the Moonshae Islands? I bet if he was, he would be more than a little bit surprised to see what happened to his precious country. No, I'm not saying that Edwin would make a bad leader - quite the opposite, yush. And yeah, this reminds of THIS (1st post), an a idea for BG3 plot (Oh, please, DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT! PLZ! You know I was reading and facepalming so hard, it rang in my ears. Yes, a creator of vampire Edwin shudders at the thought of... lich Edwin) Anyway, I know Edwin fairly powerful by the end of ToB (I, for example, had him on level 34 before the final battle) but I doubt he could take on an army of pissed off walruses Red Wizards. Do you still remember that Edwin is, technically speaking, a renegade? (Degardan confirms) Soooo... how could he unite Thay? I mean all eleven ten tharchs (excluding Surthay, reasons obvious) My guess, that designers didn't have much material to work with (compared to other characters, Edwin NEVER speaks of his family, history or home. Unless, of course, you've a romance mod installed, but then again, every detail Laufey had made is non-canon and we can't prove that her version is a right one) Basically speaking, Laufey had given Edwin almost everything designers have not: history, origin even some mystery. I can feel, as I'm writing this, that Elvira hates me now. AAAA!

Plot hole #2: The whole Elminster business
I've only one simple question: how on Gods' green Earth Toril, Elminster knew about the 'Nether scroll accident' in the party in the first place? I know, that he's the Chosen and all that BS, but this makes NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. It's so forced. I know that Elmo can hear any sentence in the Realms, only if it contains his name in it and that's. IT. Have you seen Edwin mention Elmo in the *second* game? Particularly, during NSI? Basically, no. So, Elminster couldn't have know it. And I doubt he can read minds. I really doubt. And if he actually could, I doubt Edwin would be thinking about NSI before the battle. Elmo says that he has been watching us in the ToB, but not in SoA. Unless... he was spying on CHARNAME's group all along... OMG, MYSTRA!!!

Plot hole #3: Gender has no effect on magical abilities
So, imagine this: the battle is over and Edwin is stuck as a female (oh, sweet rage!) Elminster (Of course) lols, untils his knees fail him, but, really, what happened after that? Just like my friend ~artastrophe pointed out, that Edwin is mean and tough (otherwise, he wouldn't have that attitude and constitution score of 16) He would never give up after first failure. So what stopped him from fireballing Mr. Pointy Hat to kingdom come? Designer's choice. NOOOOoooo. But no, he retreats and starts working in a tavern. How. Can. Level. 34 (In 2nd edition 34 lvl is basically a demi-god). Wizard. Work. In. A. Tavern. THIS makes... Gaugeggh. *brain explodes*

Morale: so that's why everyone (almost) uses mods to change epilogues, because this was... disturbing. Good god, to travel with CHARNAME for two years from BG1 to ToB only to work in a tavern afterwards. Disgusting. I have only one thing to say.

Even though Edwin is evil, he certainly didn't earn this fate, so Beamdog, if you're reading this and plan on making BG3, please implement a quest, where we could have sweet vengeance on that annoying Mr. Pointy Hat. For everything. Or at least make him wear a belt of masculinity/femininity. Phew. This sentence made me hate Elminster even more. Oh, yes, he's a centuries old Gary Stu, there's no denying.

*pants*

This entry is getting pretty long, if I have something more to say I'll definitely edit it out, otherwise feel free to read and review. Thank you for reading this piece of text.

EDIT: Just for myself, I really liked my reply, yay! ^^
Well, you might think that Forgotten Realms are just a rip-off, but IMO they have one of the greatest history and countries. (I admit I tried watching/reading Tolkien several times, but I found it so boring, even if I'm a hardcore fantasy lover. 'Hobbits to Isengard' don't really appeal to me and never will be.) But I think that nuking FR with a spellplague in 4e, was overkill (it's like WW2 in fantasy) If you look a little bit deeper (reading not only the wiki) I'm sure you'll find them dark and intriguing.

I posted that entry mainly because I realized that game designers completely ignored canon FR history and that's the main reason.

About sad endings: take ME3 in example. Multi-colored explosions and Shepard inevitably dies. Yipee! Every endning is sad and when 90% of the epilogue are unsatisfying, you begin to think 'What the hell? I'm sure they could have imagined something more original than this.' We're all human and almost instinctively think about good things. Not horrible ones.

Putting comic relief characters into the game proves that the game itself doesn't have any funny parts. (I know that, because I've played them) But BG is funny: it's packed with memorable quotes and situations, which aren't connected with characters. I know, I know BG2 is supposed to be darker and more disturbing, but it's humorous. And you know, I refuse to believe that game designers imported Edwin into BG2 just to have a comic relief (Minsc is funny, but we don't see anyone insulting him internet-wise) There a lot of people like that (who just want to laugh their asses off): first comment/thought would be 'morale: don't f*** with Elminster" Yeah, very admirable. They don't even try to deepen, to see the cracks. To this I can only say: RTFM.
And from where did you get that ridiculous 'fifty-six hours flat' thing? Is it written anywhere, if yes, I personally want to kick someone in the kidneys for that.

Still, all your arguments about 'Edwin giving it away' are invalid. As I already said, Edwin is close-mouthed and IS COMPLETELY SILENT when you talk to Degardan for the first time. It's only for the second time, when he realized that Degardan knows, he dropped the act.

Lemme state that I didn't in the journal: an average score in every statistic in DnD 2nd edition is 8-9. 8-9. That why all peasants are average. Game-wise Edwin doesn't have any average stats. I understand perfectly, that most of the players think 'OMG, everything must be 18 and everything else sux!' And that's why they use ctrl+8. A person who constantly runs into the same wall and makes the same mistakes is either an idiot or a brain-damaged. Can 18 INT score be an idiot? *rhetorical question* This is a paradox on it's own, since WIS doesn't control everything. With that morale you can say that Minsc should have been constantly picking his nose, or how Anome ever qualified to be a squire with 12 WIS and 10 CHA? *irony* It's so low, Ano!

Second question: from what source did you dig out *those* endings, eh? While I wasn't looking? And then you follow with some all-known examples from the game. Yes, we know that and you don't need to make an emphasis. We (a small group of devoted women) try to find something that was hidden by the designers in the first place. A pure comic relief characters wouldn't have lived through his teens. Or childhood even. 'Heeey, it's wall socket! meet my fingers!' We believe that Edwin is much more complex than this. That's why Laufey slaved so much time into him. It's fine that you see him like that (I respect your opinion and opinions of thousands) but... nah, I'm not so low.